Writing

writing

As I skim through journals past, I’m blown away by the measure in which God has shown up in our lives last year.

I mean, just incredible, mind boggling ways:  He’s restored my marriage, He’s removed addictions, He’s turned us from idols, and He’s transformed our hearts.  He has truly shown off in our lives, lately.

Truly.

Incredibly.

So why do I continue to allow doubt to seep into the recesses of my thinking, that he can and will make a way for my writing?  I mean, in terms of grandeur as compared to a total heart “transplant”, stringing some words together to make a good point- or a God point, as the case may be- seems on the easier side of things.

God gave me this gift, he must intend for me to use it for his glory, right?  And since I do believe that with my entire being, I can’t see why he wouldn’t go to work in and through me, and pour his Holy Spirit wisdom through my fingertips.  I actually can’t think of one good reason why not, though I can think of a hundred not-good reasons:

I don’t know enough.

I’m not special enough.

I’m not talented enough.

I don’t write like other people.

I’m not meant for grand.

I could never make it on the next level.

I’m not Christian writer material enough.

I’m not enough, period.

Welcome to the soundtrack of my mind, friend.  Does it bear any resemblance to your own?  The thing is, I know these thoughts are not from my Father.  God tells me I am more than enough, more than a conqueror (Romans 8:37).  He gave me this talent and he allowed me a slew of stories to share with it.  He gifted me with the gift of exhortation and asked me to share that blessing with others (1 Peter 4:10-11).

He whispers, “Have courage and take a step of faith.” (Matthew 14:27-29)

Notice how all of my doubts begin with “I”?  It isn’t God that I doubt, it’s me.  It’s my ability.

But here’s what I forget, a lot of the time, what maybe we all forget: I don’t need to live based upon what I’m capable of, I need to live remembering all that God is capable of and believing that His great power lives in me, by way of the Holy Spirit.  (Romans 8:11)

The same power that rose Christ from the dead is used for us who believe. (Ephesians 1:19-20)

My writing doesn’t have to come from my own natural ability, and I pray that it doesn’t.  My writing, my legacy, my work that will outlast my life will come from Almighty God Himself.  I can trust that.  I can believe that.  And I can surrender to that fact.

Because, while all of my limitations are about me, God says it’s never been about me at all.  It’s about Him.

Hebrews 10:35-36  “So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded.  You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised.”

God hasn’t promised me a best seller or a famous name.  He’s promised me that when I align my gifts with his will, I will live with joy and complete fulfillment.  My rewards are not necessarily going to be found in my bank account (or shoe closet)… my reward will be a life of peace until I can go home to heaven.

When I take out the “I am/am not” statements, I can focus on the truth:

Know enough.

Special enough.

Talented enough.

Write like {me}.

Meant for grand.

Make it on the next {God} level.

Christian writer material.

Enough, period.

Realizing that my writing isn’t about my writing ability, takes all the stress out of it.  I will learn about God, write about God and all that I learn, and God will guide those who need to learn what I have learned and written about, to read it.

I get to do the fun part, God will take the heavy lifting.

Amen!

sigg What statements do you keep replaying, that you can rearrange to better align with God’s truth?  Be bold, and share in the comments the old and new!